As your relationship progresses, it’s natural that you and your partner might explore new sexual activities together. Some people might be satisfied with using toys in the bedroom, while others would prefer to try swinging or open relationships which would involve bringing other individuals into the bedroom.
Dogging, which involves having sex in public places, may be on the top of your list to try together, but you may be nervous about how your partner will respond to the idea. In this article we’ll talk about how you can introduce dogging to your partner for the first time so that it works out well and both of you get what you want from it.
Bringing Up the Topic of Dogging
Even if you have a solid relationship, it can be difficult to bring up the topic of dogging. However, if your relationship is open and comfortable enough that you can talk about things without fear of judgment, then you might be able to introduce your partner to the idea of dogging.
Find a good time when you’re both feeling relaxed and ready for a discussion. Try not to bring up dogging while one or both of you are in an emotional state – this could lead to a heated argument that’ll only make it more difficult. Instead, wait until the timing is right and try discussing the idea that’s been on your mind lately.
Bring up the topic from there as a way of asking for feedback or advice. For example you could try and start the conversation about dogging with some of these statements and questions: “I’ve been thinking about how we always say we want to try new things together” | “Have you ever done anything like this before? What did you think about it?” | “Have you ever had a threesome before, would you try it again?” | “Do you think we should do something special for this event?”
These questions will give your partner the chance to share their thoughts and opinions with you, making them feel involved in the conversation. It also helps them understand where you’re coming from and what has led you to suggest these activities to them. Just because they haven’t tried something before doesn’t mean they won’t enjoy doing so now!
Don’t be surprised if they agree with you right away, or after some consideration. If they don’t agree to it straight away but seem interested in hearing more about the activity, offer some additional details by explaining why it appeals to you. What would happen at a meetup? How would someone get involved?
Do they know anyone else who’s into it? Maybe they have a friend from work, the gym, or one of the other parents they know from the school gates have mentioned it. Asking these questions will help ease any worries, establish trust, and might even make your partner realise that more of their friends go dogging than they realise! They may even end up suggesting a meetup themselves!
If you find yourself struggling to come out and mention dogging, take the initiative and just tell your partner what’s on your mind. Tell them all about dogging at first opportunity, which usually means waiting until the two of you are cuddling comfortably on the couch watching TV or talking over dinner.
Give Them Time and Space to make Their Own Decision
It’s great that you’re so open-minded, but don’t push your partner into anything. Do some research on what you’re interested in and make sure they have time to think about it. You might want to start by asking them if they’d be willing to try something new with you and go from there. This will give them time and space to make their own decision without feeling pressured.
If they decline then at least you know how they feel about dogging before suggesting it again. If they say yes then take things slowly: Allow them plenty of time to get used to the idea before even suggesting meeting up at a dogging spot or initiating a conversation about having sex in public. The more careful you are with their feelings, the more likely your partner is going to be receptive when it comes down to actually doing something together.
Don’t push your partner into something they’re not comfortable with or haven’t agreed to, going dogging for the first time can sometimes be a bit intimidating for a women, especially when there is a group of strangers standing around your car pleasuring themselves. You might want to start by going out and just watching other people do it together first before suggesting going alone or getting more involved. Don’t assume your partner has exactly the same sexual fantasies as you just because they have agreed to join you at a dogging location one evening. You need to communicate your desires openly and honestly if you want things to work out in a healthy way.
Finally, if your partner agrees to go dogging with you then make sure that both of you are always safe and responsible about it.
Maybe It’s Something They Have Thought About Already
You might think your partner is going to be shy or feel awkward about being introduced to dogging. That’s not always the case though, some people are excited and looking forward to it. Especially if they have wanted to go for a long time but were too embarrassed to bring up the subject.
They will likely want to know all of the specifics like what you wear, the type of people who go, and how often meetings happen.
Once you discover your partner feels as excited about dogging as you, then you can start talking about how much fun this lifestyle is and why it’s worth exploring together. It might take them by surprise at first when you say let’s try dogging, but I’m sure once they hear more about it, they’ll agree that it sounds like an exciting experience to add to their list of sexual adventures.
When suggesting something new during sex, it’s important that both partners have their needs met so everyone has an enjoyable time; many people say dogging gives them even more pleasure than regular sex!
If your partner seems open to the idea of swinging, but doesn’t seem convinced about dogging yet, mention how adventurous it would be for them to try something new and daring with you, they’re probably thinking that deep down anyways but just too shy to admit it.
If They Don’t Want to Go for a ‘Full On’ Dogging Experience, Maybe Just Go to Watch the First Time
The first time you take your partner dogging, you may want them to go and have a full on experience and witness the whole thing. However, if your partner is a little more hesitant or shy about it, you might consider taking them out just for a one-time trip where they can just watch other people dogging, maybe even from a distance or even the comfort of your car.
You might just need to introduce them gradually into the world of dogging so that they can feel more comfortable with the idea.
This will give them an opportunity to see what goes on without putting themselves directly in front of everyone else who’s there. Plus, it will be easier for them if they have someone with them who they feel comfortable with. If they decide that this kind of experience is something they would like to try again, or get more involved in, then you can try taking them to a site where they are encouraged to join in with others more.
If you do decide to go and just watch other people dogging, or just talk about it, be sure not to put your partner in an uncomfortable position. Try not to nag them and convince them over and over again that they should do it, but instead try talking calmly and logically about why you think they should give it a go.
You can even try going with them on a trip where they can just watch so they get a taste of what’s going on without fully committing. Just be open-minded yourself, and if your partner wants you to join in at some point, make sure you are willing to get involved as much as they are! It’s much easier for people to be comfortable when the other person is relaxed and enthusiastic.
Remember Not Everyone is as open Minded as You
Having this conversation now means there’s a good chance your partner will be much more receptive and open-minded when we start exploring the world of dogging later on.
Discussing these aspects of dogging will help them get more comfortable with the idea of trying it themselves. The best way to find out is by asking them what their thoughts are on the topic. Are they worried that they won’t like it? Do they worry that other people will judge them? Find out where their hesitation stems from so you can talk through it together.
It’s important to know if your partner has concerns or doubts before they go into something new, as you want your partner to feel safe and secure in your relationship.
But at the end of the day you must understand and appreciate that not everyone is as open minded sexually as you are, and while the idea of dogging, meeting strangers in a public location for sex might be one of your biggest fantasies, it might be fill your partner with fear and dread. If this is the case then you you must either accept their wishes, or find a more adventurous partner. This might sound brutal, but life is short and relationships where both parties aren’t sexually satisfied never last.
Accept the Possibility That Your Partner Will Never Want to Go Dogging
There is a possibility that your partner will never want to go dogging. If you and your partner come from different backgrounds, with different life experiences and outlooks on life, then you might just have to accept the fact they they will never want to go dogging.
It can be difficult to talk about something like this with someone who has no clue what it is all about, and even harder for them to understand and appreciate your desire to go out and have sexual adventures with strangers in public, even after you have told them what dogging is all about. You can try to start off by telling them that this new shared hobby will involve meeting strangers in car parks and the buzz you will both get from it, but if they remain uninterested there really isn’t anything else you can do about it to change their mind.
If your attempts to introduce your partner are unsuccessful – don’t dispair! You can meet thousands of people from all over the United Kingdom who love dogging on DoggingBook!